Silence the voice in your head with just one word.

two canoes at sunrise with text overlay silence the rude voice in your head with just one word by Rikki Goldenberg, Executive Leadership Coach, Career Coach

This post was originally shared in my semi-frequent Learn Something New(sletter). To never miss info like this, join the party! 🥳

On this week’s “I read it so you could reap the rewards”, we’re talking about Chatter by Ethan Kross. An award-winning psychologist, Ethan Kross uncovers the curiosity that is the voice inside our head. You know, that pesky thought monster that comes up right before a big presentation or at 3am when you should be sleeping. Kross shares what exactly that internal voice is as well as the steps we can take to better support ourselves and those we care about when the voice won’t hush up.

Biggest whoa moment: We talk to ourselves internally at the rate of 4,000 words per minute spoken out loud. The State of the Union is about 60 minutes and 6,000 words. So on a daily basis we’re having 320 State of the Union addresses - that’s a lot of conversation, and it can be detrimental to our wellbeing if it runs amuck. 

Put it into practice now: The fastest way to break the cycle of rumination and dangerous thinking? “Use distanced self-talk… When you’re trying to work through a difficult experience, use your name and the second-person ‘you’ to refer to yourself. Doing so is linked with less activation in brain networks associated with rumination and leads to improved performance under stress, wiser thinking, and less negative emotion” 

That’s right friends, next time you feel yourself in a tough spot, try using the magic word - your name! It worked wonders when I struggled to fall asleep after a 2am fire-alarm-blaring wake-up. Don’t worry, it was a false alarm and everyone was a-okay.

Go deeper: 

Read the book yourself: Chatter by Ethan Kross*

Check out Ethan on one of your favorite podcast: Armchair Expert, HBR Ideacast, Ten Percent Happier and more


Still struggling with that blabbermouth? Another option is to build a board of advisors - find the right people to talk to about the things that fall into their expertise. I’d be honored to join your board!

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